October ’11: Muammar Gaddafi

October 25, 2011 | Dipshits, Homosapiens, Reviews | by Chimpanzee

This is not a History class. There are reasons why Gaddafi was chosen to be our Personality of the Month; from making up his own constitution based on his questioned political ideology “Third International Theory” and publishing it under the name of “The Green book” to his links of irony between famine and using eggs in shampoos.

Green being his personal favorite color -I suppose- he made his nation’s flag a green block, named his self-made constitution “The Green Book”, and the main square in the Capital Tripoli “The Green Square”. I bet he had a crush on Tommy from The Power Rangers, or The Ninja Turtles.

Libya under his 42 year-long reign was said to be debt free, citizens had free education, free health care, newly weds were provided land and/or a dwelling, university graduates were given salaries without jobs and international scholarships to those who pursue them, Libya’s standard of living was the highest in Africa; too bad -even if that was true- there was a price to pay for that … utter and complete obedience!

By the way, my Libyan source says the previous paragraph is quote “Original Bullshit”.

It was a lot like a Maximum Security Prison on high standards, food might have been provided, there might be gym and TV facilities, but whoever touches the fence by mistake gets shot!

We’re talking about Students being hanged on Campus for being politically active, we’re talking about executing a couple of thousands of prisoners in some jail for an escape attempt, we’re talking about holding cells under the desert sands that eventually become mass-tombs, we’re talking about invading Chad for God-knows-what, and an idiotic attack on Egypt, we’re talking about involvement in assassinations and plane hijackings, we’re talking about stolen wealth of the nation. In the recent uprising; we’re talking about forcing and hiring citizens of neighboring African countries to become Mercenaries, we’re talking about using artillery rounds on people in towns, we’re talking about mass-execution of troops who refused to fire on civilians, putting actual criminals in uniform. We’re talking about much more than what a post can take!

Harvey Dent’s quote from The Dark Knight: “you either die a hero, or live long enough to see yourself become the villain” could apply to Gaddafi in the sense that he started his “career” as a revolutionary who would bring justice to his nation; talk about irony.

In fact, talk about irony as in when he called the 2011 Revolutionaries “rats”, he didn’t know he would die like an actual rat dragged out of a hole in “Sirte” and shot in the head (a move we personally applaud, since it makes all the “investigations”, “moral issues”, and “trials” irrelevant).

People having a problem with demising dictators have to know the simple fact that there’s no good leader in this age who would stay in power for 20, 30, 40 years (Gamal Abdel Nasser and his likes were dictators, yet exceptions).

Gaddafi, we enjoyed your ranting speeches up to the last one, your talent in standup comedy was unmatched, but your time on this Earth has come to an end, and like all fallen dictators before and after you, only crows will walk in your funeral.